Wednesday, 30 June 2010

Raise and hold your leg please...

* Don't worry - there are no before and after pictures in this post! But let's set the scene:

A bush.

I'm not the best at de-hairing myself.  I shave my legs as and when, my underarms more often (obviously - eewww) and my Lady Garden? Well, it hasn't been waxed in about 9 years.  Let's just say I maintain it myself...(my poor mum is going to die when she reads this post).

So when I was offered the chance to visit Xenia Yordanova at Eleven salon - just off Bond Street - I thought it was perhaps an opportunity to take maintenance - you know - down there - a little more seriously.

Xenia is a no-nonsense yet warm powerhouse of a therapist.  After getting me to strip off from the waist down - she held up a modesty towel (thank GOD) while I got on to the bed - which, incidentally was still dressed for a facial with full bedding - nice - my previous experiences have involved therapists stripping the bed right back to the plastic and using a strip of bedroll down the middle - practicality for them - not comfort of the client - taking precedence.

Xenia asked what I was after - the thought 'to have it look less like Epping Forest' did cross my mind - but we went for between a normal bikini wax and a Brazilian.  A Hollywood? Not for me thanks - I'm not keen. I think we're supposed to have something down there - no?? And I went for strip wax - I hate hot wax - I don't understand people who say it is less painful. Ugh!

And then?  'Raise your leg and hold it and pull this area tight for me.' OK. This part was new to me - and I was seriously embarrassed - this woman has now seen parts of me previously only seen by my husband and gynaecologist - and yet the look on her face was one of total concentration and professionalism.

My embarrassment quickly disappeared and we started talking - in the way that you ask a taxi driver 'you been busy?' - I asked Xenia - 'I bet you've got some horror waxing stories haven't you!?' And - well - she did - but I think therapist etiquette is 'what is said in the room stays in the room'. But let's just say cleanliness is a courtesy to your therapist - as she said - 'if you are going to the dentist - you brush your teeth!'

And the waxing? Everything you would hope it to be - quick, when I say quick - I mean - pro-level quick - 10 minutes tops - (perfect for squeezing it in at lunchtime), clean, efficient - and done exactly how I wanted it - not how she thought it would be - again - sign of a good therapist - someone who actually listens to you! - she wanted to take more off - baby steps people - give me a chance!

If you are a regular waxer - especially in you know - that area...  you need to visit this woman. Brazilians and Hollywoods are her speciality.  And it shows. I'm going back.

Highly recommended.

Xenia Yordanova is based at Eleven, 11 Blenheim Street, W1.
Appointments - 0207 491 2390
Prices start at £18 for a bikini, rising to £35 and £40 respectively for Brazilians and Hollywoods.


  1. Frank and honest Miss Hirons, and frankly, if I'm honest- I need to visit this wonderful place too.

  2. ok, you are now on the list of "not to read while drinking coffee due to spew factor"...seriously, that was some good laughing.
    Lady Garden.....never heard that one before. Like it.
    and yes, its hard to imagine that some people don't keep their Naughty Bits clean.
    That was a good read!

  3. I’d always wanted a professional treatment done in this er, region but shyness put me off until I convinced myself there was no alternative if I wanted to wear bikini bottoms. I know they’ve seen hundreds of women’s nether regions but they ain’t seen mine. Any hoo, like my hair stylist, I prefer the same person to take care of me and refuse to see anyone else but her.

    I’ve been going for over a year now and the pain factor does fluctuate depending on my hormones apparently. I wonder, if I take painkillers beforehand, will that numb the pain?

    After all this time, I have no idea what goes on ‘down there’. I just see the ‘before’ and ‘after’. I think she applies hot wax from some kind of applicator (!) I hate the feeling of the applicator getting stuck sometimes (urgh, sorry!) and even though I’ve had about 15 Brazilians, I still can’t relax! She really struggled on my last visit, saying I was making her job a little difficult but I can’t help tensing up because I know what’s coming.

    She then uttered some mortifying words as she finished me off with soothing lotion – said it was like a baby. I am assuming she was referring to wiping lotion on as you would after you’ve changed a baby’s nappy.

    The one good thing is it’s over in minutes and it really makes a difference in terms of re-growth slowing down and all round tidiness. I visit Fenwicks in Brent Cross and pay £28 so £35 for Bond Street sounds reasonable to me.

    Can I be shameless and plug my personal account?

    Thank you for one of the funniest and entertaining posts. :)

  4. Thanks Kelly Ann.

    You must email me so I have your email address!!!